Riham (ayshariham) wrote in bleachness,

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25 Ways to Annoy Byakuya [Fanfic-ish]

Why is Bleachness so lifeless? Where are all the fanart-ers, essay-writers, character-discussers? =P Just a lil something to liven it up xD

Link to this on ff.net.

All of the below pranks will award you with atleast a haircut/clothes cut from Senbonzakura. A few might be fatal. Use at your own risk.
1. Invite him to a fish BBQ. Let slip that the fish was taken from his pond.
2. Tell Mayuri that Byakuya has requested him to use Senbonzakura in any Zanpaktou Experiment.
3. Turn his basement into an underground amusement park. Charge all costs to his bank account. (Or whatever system they have in Soul Society) Offer free rides for the children of Rukongai. If he tries to stop you, accuse him of standing in the way of charity.
4. Send Ishida to make Byakuya’s Shinigami robes “more fashionable”. Tell Ishida to sew on frills if he gets a chance. Allow him to add a cape too.
5. Address him as Bya-kun, Bya-chan, Bya-chin or Bya-Bya (or if you are more daring, simply Byakuya with no pref/suffixes).
6. Spread a rumour that Byakuya is in love with Renji/Kenpachi/Genryuusai-dono.
7. Tell him your mom’s only sister’s daughter’s only cousin has a cooler Zanpaktou than him. (Extra caution alert: Prepare to use Shunpo to get away in case Byakuya figures out it‘s you.)
8. Draw tiny pink hearts on all reports that you submit to him. (Dot your “i”’s with pink hearts for extra effects.) Blush if he asks you about it.
9. Kidnap Rukia and leave behind a note threatening to kill her unless he sends a shirtless photo of himself as ransom.
10. Publish the photo in Seireitei’s magazine if he complies.
11. Send him Hell-butterflies with random messages. (Examples include, “I’m hungry”, “I need to pee” and “There’s a green stain on the back of your robes”)
12. Replace his Head Chef with Inoue for a day.
13. Persuade his squad/staff to play Hopscotch when they should be on duty.
14. Persuade HIM to play Hopscotch when he’s on duty.
15. Beat him at it. Everytime.
16. Tie him up with the “Winding Binding Spell” and call in artists to paint portraits of him.
17. Blow one up and hang it in the middle of Seireitei.
18. Throw him a noisy Surprise Birthday party at his mansion. Have an incorrect number of candles on his cake. Let Yachiru sing songs all night long.
19. Don’t forget to invite Matsumoto and stack up on sake.
20. Mutter “Kuchiki Kuchiki” repeatedly every time he passes by. If he questions you about it, tell him you have an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
21. Bang on his bedroom door at dawn, very noisily. When he inquires what the racket is about, tell him his rooster died.
22. Dye his scarf pink. (For an extra thrill, draw yellow ducks on it)
23. Streak his hair pink, if possible, to match the scarf.
24. Interrupt his calligraphy classes to teach them Cursive Writing.
25. Kiss him. (Note: Hisana is the only one who seems to have gotten away with this.)

Share some of your own ideas xD
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