?

Log in

No account? Create an account
 
 
17 October 2009 @ 12:38 pm
Drabble  
Hi there :). Missed the chapter discussion this week, but I came up with a quick and dirty drabble this morning and thought I'd share.

It's untitled, rated g, Renji-POV right after 378.


It’s not warm like Captain Unohana’s. Unohana’s healing kidou is soft and gentle and full of warmth that wends its way into your body and shushes it until it sleeps and mends. This one’s not as good and has a touch of frost that makes your wounds go numb even as they stitch together.

You’d recognize this touch in hell itself.

“Renji,” Rukia breathes when you open your eyes. “Can you fight?”

Your legs ache, your lungs burn, and you don’t think you could stand straight without pitching over into the sand and puking.

“Sure,” you say. “Just give me a minute.”

She nods. You put your hand on her knee when you can move it. Her thigh is thin and tiny and fragile but firm with muscles that she earned a long time ago. You stroke your thumb across a tear in her hakama. She doesn’t notice that you’re touching her.

“It’s Ichigo,” she says. She bites her lip and looks across the long, wide sand.

You turn your head. It’s messy, like a dust storm. Lots of sand kicking up. Some blood. Two figures going at it in the distance, one the espada, the other a speck of black that shutters with shunpo in the wind.

“He’s winning,” Rukia says. Her voice sounds hollow.

You turn your head back. It doesn’t hurt as much as it did before. You think your legs could hold your weight.

“Is Inoue safe?”

There’s a slight flutter of wind and the sudden smell of human antiseptics when someone steps out of shunpo and crouches behind you.

“Inoue-san’s not the one who needs saving,” Ishida says. For a moment, he sounds like Kira did the last time you saw him, and your gut clenches with worry. But then you hear him take another of those clips off his belt, and he mutters ‘Idiot shinigami’ under his breath. So that’s okay.

Rukia’s hands stop glowing then, and she helps you sit up. You have the sudden urge to throw up, but it passes.

Inoue’s running up to you from where Ishida came. Her eyes and nose are pink from crying. Chad’s staggering to his feet a few feet away. He wobbles, but it seems to pass. He rubs his head. He smells of Rukia’s kidou too.

Rukia uses your shoulder to stand and helps you up. Her eyes are wet.

“Can you fight?” she asks again.

Somewhere in the midst of the sand and the blood, the thing that’s Ichigo lets out a screech like a hollow.

Right, then. Once more into the breach.

You charge with a roar and with the others at your side.
Tags: ,
 
 
 
Have Fun Storming the Castle!: IchiIshi-bwannieroo2 on October 17th, 2009 06:30 pm (UTC)
Oh that was lovely. The second person pov worked really well in this, especially given Renji's thought processes.

The differences in kidou healing were a fabulous way to start and the ending was totally cheer worthy.

Very cool. :D
schweinsty: Ichigoschweinsty on October 18th, 2009 02:48 am (UTC)
Oh, thank you! I've only written 2nd person a couple of times before, so I'm glad it turned out okay :D.
wiltorawiltora on October 17th, 2009 07:34 pm (UTC)
Uh, I actually want this to happen now. Awesome.
schweinsty: Lenalee Sparkleschweinsty on October 18th, 2009 02:48 am (UTC)
:D. Thanks!
aeriiluxe_love on October 17th, 2009 08:16 pm (UTC)
I really liked the second person POV and it was from Renji's perspective too -- double thumbs up. I also like Rukia's and Ishida's ominous hinting at Ichigo's dilemma; they are the ones who understand him the best at the moment, after all.

"Can you fight?" --> makes me happy inside for some reason. Ending is great.
Thanks for sharing!!!
schweinsty: Sneaky Rukiaschweinsty on October 18th, 2009 11:53 pm (UTC)
Thank you for reading! 2nd Person isn't something I do much, so I'm glad to hear I pulled it off.
_debbiechan__debbiechan_ on October 17th, 2009 10:23 pm (UTC)

Oh so good. One thing I like about your writing is that it always tickles me to get on with my own. Can't wait for your contest entry. <3
schweinsty: Sneaky Rukiaschweinsty on October 19th, 2009 12:29 am (UTC)
XD. Well, shit, now I really have to get it done *tickles deb's writing brain* :P.
Meganamciel on October 18th, 2009 06:21 pm (UTC)
I really enjoyed this! I feel a little sad for being out of town and missing the huge party when 378 went up--this actually made up for it! Wonderful short.
schweinsty: Bleach Alltogetherschweinsty on October 19th, 2009 12:30 am (UTC)
Thank you! I missed it too (way too much homework D:), so it was really fun to write :D.
koizumi_miwakoizumi_miwa on October 19th, 2009 12:23 pm (UTC)
Nice :D Second POV is hard to pull off, but you got it right!